New year is upon us. If the Mayans were right we haven’t realized that yet. I had a neighbor child ask me what my resolutions were. I said I wanted to work harder and more and eat less. He asked me what last year’s resolutions were. I said I wanted to work harder and more and eat less.
It’s funny, and it’s not. The year changes but we don’t. Instead, the same flaws and dings come to the surface.
I’m not so sure I believe much in New Year resolutions. If it was that great an idea, it should be employed now. Not on a special date.
But I did run into a blog called Mark and Angel Hack Life that made some sense to me. I don’t know much about them. You can read their blog from the link. It was called Things you must give up to find peace.
But they had a very interesting useful laundry list. I won’t quote their comments, which are worthy. But for the New Year, I’d like to square my thinking, not my behavior. It seems to me that thinking is what I really can change. And that I’m willing to take on.
1. Old regrets and excuses.
Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional. How long can I beat myself with guilt?
2. The burning desire to have all the answers.
No one I know has them. Why should I?
3. The false hope of a pain-free life.
The medical version of this is leprosy. Appealing, yes?
4. Ties to insensitive people.
The best thing I know to do for people is to take them exactly where they are.
5. Obsessing yourself with negative news.
You really can’t fix stuff that isn’t somehow directly in front of you.
6. The belief that fulfillment resides in the end result.
The journey is always everything. Which is good because I’ve had a lot of journeys.
7. Measuring your success by material wealth.
Note to self: Rent a dumpster. Do you really want your kids cleaning out your stash?
8. The need to keep everything the same.
Change is good. Change is good. Change is good. If I say it over and over again will I believe it?
Actually, probably yes. All of this stuff is very hard. As everything worthwhile is. It strikes me this is a laundry list against the things that foment despair, darkness and depression. I believe they should be fought ferociously. Not with harsh treatment or blame or shame. But with the kind knowledge that they are useless in my life, and that I don’t have to give them anything.
So my New Years resolution is to take myself by the hand, child that I am and gently tell myself no when I wander into the places that breed despair. Will I succeed? If the journey is my destination, how can I fail?
I wish the same for you as well. Find more joy. Dump more rage. Stretch your wings. I will see you on the road.